Review: Ryan’s Bed by Tijan

When I first heard about Tijan’s new book, I upfront prepared myself for a bit of gut wrench. Then I’ve caught glimpse of reviews about this being sort of taboo and all. That drove me to crazylandia of agonizing waiting game. I decided to read it, three days after getting it, don’t judge me (lol). I felt like I need to prepare myself for a wreck and boy did reading the freakin’ table of contents confirm my suspicion. I will be ruined by this book.

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The story is told on a first person’s POV, and this is Mackenzie’s. As the blurb indicates, the book started with her sleeping at Ryan’s bed a few hours after her twin sister committed suicide. Mac and her family are new to the town and it’s where they met Ryan’s family. Now, Ryan stood up among the crowd in Mac’s view.

“I wasn’t the type of girl to notice a guy and stalk him from afar. No, no, I was the type to notice a guy and then notice the hot dog stand beyond him. Willow would go for the guy, and I would go for the hotdog.”

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Reading the first chapter will prepare you for the massive upturn of feelings this book will create in you.

“I stood in the doorway as I watched myself. And I kept screaming, until suddenly, I stopped. I choked on a sob, and like that, I was back in my body.

My face: dark eyes, golden blonde hair, heart-shaped chin.

My body: slender arms, long legs, and petite frame.

My heart: beautiful, broken, bleeding.

All of it on the bathroom floor in a bloodied pile.”

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At Chapter four, I was feeling that reading adrenaline rush I first felt when reading Fallen Crest High. It was a Tijan induced reading mania, very subtle and in a click, you are sucked into the characters world, living the characters life. In this book, you will become Mackenzie. You will feel the glory and rawness of her metamorphosis. From her perception of herself as a passive person to taking the front and center. The unfolding of her changing is beautiful.

After many chapters in, you will realize how different this book is to what you perceive it’s going to be. This book will take you a turn where you get to fight for the characters, to embrace them enough for you to know that you’ll be in a hangover days after reading it. Scenes and emotions are the kind that will linger.

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This is a book about mourning, of coping, of surviving. It wrecked me, gutted my heart ten ways to eternity and not healing it, ever. However, the ending will make you hold on to the story more, it will make you embrace on repeat Mac’s words, thoughts, actions. It’s a book that will have you searching answers but make you realize that such is life, some questions are meant to be hanging. I’d rather Tijan make a sequel of this book, but I will also be contented if she won’t. Ugh. I can’t stress enough how beautiful this book is.

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